Millennials Part 1

Many of us grew up subject to failed parenting strategies. Examples, they were told they were special all the time. told that they could have anything they want in life just because they want it. got special recognition in school not because they earned but because their parents complained. some got A's not because they earned but because they didn't want to deal with their parents at parent teacher conference, I know right feel old yet? some got participation medals, you got a medal for coming in last. the science is pretty clear, if you get a medal for coming in class it devalues the medal you get for coming in first after working so hard. this in turn makes the recipient of this last place award feel embarrassed and makes them feel worse. so you takes this group of people after they graduate school and they get a job and thrusted into the real world and in an instant they find out that they are not special, their parents cannot get them a promotion, you get nothing for coming in last and that oh by the way you can’t have anything just because you want it. So again, in an instant their entire self-image is shattered. This entire generation is growing up with lower self-esteem than previous generations and to make matters worse we live in an Instagram, Facebook world in other words that we are good at putting filter on things. We are good at show people that life even you some of you are depressed. So, everyone sounds tough and they sound like they have it figured out, but the reality is that there is very little toughness and very few people have it figured out. So, the older ones grew up in this and when they get into a position of mentorship they tell the disciple’s THIS IS WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO, but they have no clue.  No let’s introduce tech its quite simple to explain actually, we know that whenever you receive a text there is a chemical in your brain that is released called dope that is why when you get that text, it feels good. Its why we count the likes it is why we check the feed every second. This is the same effect of drugs, alcohols and gambling. We have age restrictions on all those things but not on phones or social media, my nephew has an iPhone, HE IS 5 YEARS OLD. That is like showing your adolescent the liquor cabinet and telling them, hey if this adolescent thing gets you down, don’t worry we got you. Now why is this important during adolescent we no longer seek the mediation of or parents but of our peers, very stressful for our parents but very important for us this lets us acculturate outside of our immediate families, so we can adapt to the outside world. This is the same thing that goes through an alcoholic’s brain because during the high stress moments of adolescent’s they have the numbing effects of alcohol and drugs and social media and when the need help they don’t turn to people they turn to the bottle. And we see as they get older its hardwired in them this type of thought process and it is extremely difficult to them to form deep meaningful relationships. We come to admit and see that most of their relationships are superficial. The don’t count of their so called “friends” they know they will cancel on them the moment something better comes along. This is because they haven’t practiced the skill set and don’t have the coping mechanism to deal with the stresses of life. We know that people who spend more time on social media suffer higher rates of depression. There is an imbalance, alcohol isn’t bad too much alcohol is bad, gambling is fun TO MUCH gambling is DANGEROUS. If your sitting your friends and your texting someone that’s not there, that’s a problem, that’s an addiction. If you are at a meeting and someone is speaking, and you put your phone on the table face up or down I don’t care, you are sending a subconscious message to everyone in that room that sorry your just not that important to me right now. If you wake up and check your phone before you say good morning to your spouse or family, YOU HAVE AN ADDICTION. In time it can destroy relations, cost money and worst of all cost you time.